Contact me to publish part of all this book.
Memoir of a Gay Gringo
By Cal Avocado
I am the Gay Gringo facing old age and looking back on my history through many romances, especially one. I arrived in Mexico bursting with dreams for love after 25 years in San Francisco and New York as the AIDS epidemic began and burned through. Fulfillment came but not as I hoped. My conflict is not wanting boundaries for love and sex in a world of homophobia, disease, poverty and the nature of men, full of boundaries.
I planted my desires into Paco like a container that would take them. Each event between us leafed into possibilities and problems. My thoughts grew seeds of doubt and hope into vines, and rained and shined over them. He might not recognize himself from my point of view and feel insulted as will others described. These are my opinions. I’m not a camera. I’ve changed names of the men to blur their identities. Most people will prefer a portrait of themselves as a beautiful flower or a god, myself included. I present details but not with the vanity or consideration to hide ugly. I could fictionalize to be safe, but wanted the dirt stains of real places on my pages. We name streets after ideas we support, not diseases we suffer, but both are equally guides to our lives. The empathy of biography has a familiar smell, like actual bodies, sweet or stinking. Autobiography is musty paper crumbling apart in your fingers recalling its original oils, delivering an unrepeatable, nostalgic experience fiction cannot.